Posted on December 15, 2015 in Division of Assets

Divorces can become ugly, and all too often spouses attempt to hide assets from each other. People going through a divorce should be cautious, and ensure they have a clear picture of their shared finances, so they know what they are entitled to from their divorce settlement. Some divorcing individuals will go to great lengths to hide money or other assets from their spouse. They open new bank accounts, hide money with friends, go on spending sprees, or avoid disclosing retirement and other investment accounts, to name just a few possibilities. Now, experts are worried about another potential way spouses could hide money from each other. Bitcoin, a new high-tech form of digital currency, is difficult to track and regulate, making it an attractive option for those wishing to hide money from their spouse.

Bitcoin, created in 2008, is a digital currency accessible from anywhere in the world. It is not restricted by any government, does not rely on any bank, and gives it’s users the option to remain anonymous. Since it’s creation, the currency has grown tremendously. One 2013 report showed the total number of Bitcoins around the world to be valued at over 10 billion US dollars. In 2015, the currency is still growing, and more vendors around the world are starting to accept it. Governments across the globe are struggling with regulating Bitcoin. Since it allows users to store money and purchase goods anonymously from anywhere in the world, states and countries are unable to tax or control the currency.

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 Posted on December 10, 2015 in Divorce

People get divorced for a variety of reasons. Often, an extramarital affair or breach of trust is at the center of a divorce, but there are many other ways couples can strain their relationship. While cheating and lying are two surefire ways to hurt your marriage, and potentially lead you to divorce, there are many other ways you may be doing damage, sometimes even unknowingly. Below are a few mistakes that are often catalysts for divorce, and tips on how you can avoid making them.

1. You Confide in Other People

Having relationships outside your marriage is necessary and healthy. Trouble starts, however, if you start emotionally confiding in people besides your spouse. Your spouse should be the person you turn to for almost anything, so opening up to outsiders will likely leave your spouse feeling betrayed.

Be sure that despite the friends and other family members you are close with, your spouse feels like you open up to him or her the most. Maintaining friendships is important, but the moment you and a friend share a connection greater than one you share with your spouse, something is wrong. If your spouse notices, they will feel like they are not the most important person in your life anymore. Be especially cautious of confiding in someone you are attracted to. Not only will this make your spouse even more nervous, but if you are attracted to your confidante, you are on a slippery slope that could easily become an affair.

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 Posted on December 08, 2015 in Divorce

As any marriage counselor would tell you, trust between spouses is a major sign of a healthy relationship. Successful marriages depend on both partners being transparent with each other. Breaches of trust usually happen when one spouse lies to or cheats on the other spouse. Did you know, however, that financial infidelity could spell trouble for your marriage as well? Millions of married Americans report engaging in financial infidelity, a dangerous game to play when a majority of marriage experts say money is the number one issue couples fight about. Are you keeping financial secrets from your spouse? If so, you are not alone, according to a recent survey.

Understanding Financial Infidelity

Financial infidelity is a serious problem for married couples, and while keeping secrets about money may not seem as devastating as an actual affair with an outside person, lying about money can destroy the trust between you and your spouse, and can eventually lead to divorce. Financial infidelity can come in a variety of forms, not all of them nefarious. Things like hidden bank accounts, serious secret debts, and gambling addictions all make the list, but even things like making small purchases without your spouse’s knowledge could be considered financial infidelity. Many married people may be committing financial infidelity without even realizing it.

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 Posted on December 03, 2015 in Child Custody

For divorced parents, communication is crucial. Studies show that post divorced children are most successful when they are able to spend time with both parents, so being able to coordinate and communicate with your ex is absolutely necessary. Speaking with an ex, however, is often much easier said than done. How can you be expected to communicate with a person you would rather not speak to again in your life? While keeping in touch with your ex can be difficult, there are many different tools co-parents can use to keep their communication conflict free. The next time you need to get in touch with your ex, try one of these effective strategies.

Email

Email is a valuable tool for co-parents. Emails are typically quick and to the point, leaving little room for emotion or personal attacks. Emails are very effective for communicating schedules, upcoming activities, and updates on the child’s well being. This is an especially valuable tool for parents who struggle with communicating in person or over the phone, as it allows both parents to quickly get their message across with little time to bring up past issues. Give your ex an email address that you check frequently, and be sure they give you the same. When preparing your emails, type them as if you were writing a colleague or friend. Keep things friendly, simple, and to the point. Keep in mind that your emails could potentially be used in court, if further litigation is needed, so avoid any personal attacks or vulgar language that may reflect poorly on you down the road. As a courtesy, co-parents should respond to any email they receive from each other, even it is simply to acknowledge that a message has been received.

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 Posted on December 01, 2015 in Divorce

Is heavy usage of social media sites like Facebook and Instagram an early indicator that you are heading towards divorce? While you are connecting with friends and family around the world, are you neglecting the most important relationship: your marriage? While a little screen time is certainly nothing to be afraid of, a recently published study found that heavy usage of social media sites does in fact correlate with higher divorce rates. Is your Facebook use putting your marriage at risk?

People have long wondered about social media's impact on in person relationships. Families spend whole dinners on their individual devices. Couples lay in bed next to each other scrolling through Instagram on their Ipads rather than communicating. Everywhere you look someone is texting, tweeting, or scrolling through social media sites. If you feel like social media has disconnected you from your spouse, you are not alone. Because of this, researchers at Boston University set out to find any real correlation between broken marriages and social media use. Studying married couples between 2008 and 2011, researchers found that there is a significant correlation between heavy social media use and relationship troubles and divorce.

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 Posted on November 26, 2015 in Divorce

American seniors are divorcing more than ever before. Today, married people over 50 are two times as likely to divorce as they were in 1990. While the divorce rate for young and middle aged couples has remained relatively steady over the past 30 to 40 years, the number of “grey divorces” is rising quickly. What could be driving a growing number of older married couples towards divorce? A recent study sheds some light on the issue.

Experts have tracked the increasing number of grey divorces over the past few years, and discovered some interesting results. While the popular consensus is that divorce is increasing across the board for every demographic, in reality, the divorce rate in the US has only changed slightly over the past 30 years or so. Basically, most marriages today are as likely to end in divorce as they were in the late 80‘s. This is not the case, however, for couples 50 and older. Statistics show that of people getting divorced, nearly 1 in 4 of them is over 50 years old. Nearly 1 of every 10 divorcees is over 64. Those numbers are double the divorce rates of seniors in 1990, and experts predict the trend will continue to grow. Are seniors becoming unhappy later in life?

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 Posted on November 25, 2015 in Divorce

If you are going through a divorce, or preparing for one, you likely have a divorce support team. This team includes your divorce attorney, supportive friends and family members, and possibly other help like therapists or counselors. If you are worried about costly divorce mistakes, or are hoping to ensure you get a fair divorce settlement, consider adding a financial adviser to your team. People often assume that financial advisers are only necessary for high net worth divorces, when complicated financial situations make splitting assets difficult. Yes, a financial adviser, or even a team of financial experts, is likely needed for high net worth divorces, but there are plenty of everyday divorce situations in which having a financial adviser is beneficial as well. If you and your spouse are heading for a divorce, or are already in the middle of one, it may be in your best interest to hire a financial adviser.

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 Posted on November 19, 2015 in Divorce

If you have very young children and are facing divorce, you may be worried about the impact that separating from your spouse will have on them. Infants and toddlers have a very limited understanding of the world around them, and will likely not understand what is happening. They can, however, still be significantly impacted by stressful events like divorce. Regardless of the child’s understanding of the divorce situation, changes in a child’s environment and relationships with their parents can affect early development. Divorcing parents, with toddlers and infants, should be aware of the affects the transition can have on their child, and understand how to help them cope.

Birth to 8 Months

Even the youngest of infants can pick up on the emotions of their parents. Despite being unable to understand what a divorce entails, small infants often mirror their parents' feelings. If a parent is depressed or sad due to their divorce, their infant will likely feel depressed or sad as well. At this early stage, infants do not have much control over their own emotions, so they are easily influenced by their parent’s mood. Infants can not express their emotions by communicating, so distressed infants will likely become more fussy and are less easily comforted when a stressful event is going on in their parents' lives.

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 Posted on November 17, 2015 in Division of Assets

Millions of married couples purchase homes together. With two combined incomes, couples are able to afford nicer and larger properties, and many intend on settling down and starting a family together. Although the real estate market is down from its peak a few years ago, purchasing a home is still extremely expensive, and most couples take out a joint mortgage. While the intention may be to pay off the home together over time, that is not always the outcome. If you and your spouse are facing a divorce, what happens with your shared mortgage? There are a few different options from which to choose, depending on your individual situation.

Illinois is an equitable division state, meaning that any marital property is to be divided fairly between both parties. This includes, but is not limited to, cars, furniture, bank accounts, and your shared home. In most cases, the home will be in both spouses' names, as it is often necessary to combine incomes to qualify for a mortgage. This means that both spouses are entitled to a portion of the equity value, and are both responsible for any shared mortgage debt. This is risky. No matter what your divorce agreement says, if both names remain on a mortgage, both spouses, even when separated, are responsible for paying off the debt. Lenders do not abide by divorce agreements, and, therefore, are able to go after any party still listed on the mortgage note. Couples have a few different options on how to handle their shared mortgage, depending on their financial and personal situations.

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 Posted on November 12, 2015 in Divorce

Tough economic times are leading America’s poorest married couples to choose separation over divorce, a recent study reports. Divorces are costly for many reasons. While legal fees play a part, other factors like shared health insurance plans and if the couple has children play a role in keeping disadvantaged couples together. With divorce on the rise in America, it makes sense that economically disadvantaged couples are still splitting up, but choosing the cheaper alternative of long term separation over divorce.

Longitudinal Research

The study, conducted by researchers at Ohio State University, surveyed 7,272 people between 1979 and 2008, all of whom were married at some point throughout the survey period. A large majority of the couples who separated reported getting a divorce within three years of their break up. Approximately 15 percent, however, separated but did not get a divorce for at least 10 years after their separation. The study’s authors noticed that, of the 15 percent that remained married despite being separated, a large majority were economically disadvantaged. They simply could not afford to get a divorce. Many in the married but separated group had lower levels of education, tended to be Hispanic or African American, and had young children. “In every measure we had, including family background, income and education, those who remain separated are more disadvantaged than those who end up divorcing,” one of the study’s authors reported.

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