Posted on April 05, 2016 in Divorce

Have you ever wondered which country in the world has the highest divorce rate? You may be quick to think it is the United States, due to nearly half of all marriages in the United States ending in divorce today. America is high on the list, coming in at the third highest divorce rate in the world, with 4 divorces per thousand citizens. That number may be high, but it is less than half the divorce rate of the country with the most divorces in the world. Surprisingly, the Maldives, a tropical paradise comprised of 1,200 tiny islands, holds the Guinness World Record for the highest divorce rate in the world, coming in at a staggering 11 divorces per thousand people. What is causing this trouble in paradise?

Strict Religion, But Quick Divorces

According to the United Nations, the average female resident of the Maldives has been divorced three times by the time she is 30 years old. That number is significant, even as the stigma surrounding divorce dissipates around the world. According to an expert with the John Jay College of Criminal Justice in New York, the startling divorce rate can be accredited to the country’s primary religion. The Maldives is a Muslim country, and premarital sex is not permitted under Sharia Law. The country’s young population, experts say, have found a way around the disapproval of their religion. Instead of premarital sex, young Maldivians get married, which can cost as little as ten dollars, and is not as significant a process as it is in much of the rest of the world. Once married, the couple is free to do as they please.

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 Posted on March 31, 2016 in Divorce

Divorce is a challenging process for everyone involved. While you cope with your emotions, your children are processing their own feelings. Parents often feel guilty when it comes to divorce and their children. No, your children most likely did not ask for you and your spouse to separate, and they may struggle during the initial transition time. That does not mean divorce was the wrong decision. Instead of dwelling on guilt, focus on ways to help your children cope with the process and come out feeling loved and supported.

As a parent, you can help your children in a number of ways. You can reassure them, provide as stable a transition as possible, and work through any issues with your ex to ensure your children will continue to have both parents in their lives. All of this on top of dealing with your own emotions can be difficult. Too often, parents prioritize their children over themselves when coping with divorce. While your children do deserve extra support, you can only be your most effective self when you have taken care of you. Remember the saying on an airplane? “Secure your own oxygen mask before helping others.” You need to take care of yourself first, so you can be the best parent possible for your children during this challenging time.

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 Posted on March 29, 2016 in Divorce

While uncommon, financial fraud does occur during divorce. In most cases, one spouse attempts to hide or misrepresent assets, and their actions, if successful, can lead to an unfair divorce settlement. How can you tell if your spouse is hiding money from you, or trying to scam you out of a fair settlement in some way? There are a few common red flags that can indicate your spouse is being shady with your finances, and a few places you can turn to for help. The first step is recognizing that the problem is occurring.

Warning Signs

If you and your spouse are about to divorce, or already in the midst of the divorce process, you may be dealing with some unresolved emotions. Anger, betrayal, frustration, and sadness are common. If your spouse was unfaithful or asked for a divorce out of the blue, your trust in them may be shaken. What else have they been keeping from you? Are they trying to skew your divorce settlement, or commit some other type of financial fraud? If you have a solid grasp on your family’s finances and do not notice anything out of the ordinary, it is unlikely any fraudulent activity is taking place. The more complicated your shared finances are, however, the more chances your spouse has to commit fraud against you. The more places you have assets stored, the easier it is for your spouse to be fraudulent. Divorce experts say to pay attention to these few key indicators:

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 Posted on March 24, 2016 in Divorce

Choosing to consult a divorce attorney can be a difficult decision. Many people hesitate to seek help, as they may feel their marital problems are unsolvable, or that they failed at their relationship. In reality, an initial consultation with an attorney is just that - a chance to learn more about your options without being committed to anything. Simply meeting with an attorney does not mean you are locked into a divorce, but an experienced attorney will be able to present to you your future options should you choose to proceed.

People often wonder what their first meeting will be like, and for many individuals, a consultation with a divorce lawyer may be the first experience they have with an attorney of any kind. While you should not feel nervous or uncomfortable, you should come prepared to be honest and inquisitive. Prior to your first consultation with an attorney, consider these steps for preparing yourself.

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 Posted on March 22, 2016 in Prenuptial Agreements

According to a recently released survey by the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers (AAML), 50 percent of divorce attorneys nationwide report an increase in couples seeking postnuptial agreements. You have likely heard of prenuptial agreements, documents that couples draft before their marriage that detail what should happen in the event of divorce. Lawyers across the country recommend prenuptial agreements, and say that, while nobody enjoys discussing a divorce before their marriage, the documents help couples avoid potential marital conflicts before they arise. In Illinois, a prenuptial agreement can cover a variety of topics, such as property division and inheritance matters. A postnuptial agreement serves a similar purpose but is accessible to couples after they are married.

Why Get a Postnuptial Agreement?

Attorneys say couples seek postnuptial agreements when they believe the future of their marriage is in jeopardy. Rather than wait until a divorce, when emotions are high, postnuptial agreements allow couples to plan for important matters beforehand. “A postnuptial agreement is usually produced from some kind of serious strain or emotional fracture that directly impacts the marriage. It can represent a way for the spouses to move forward with a shared understanding about the ways in which certain subjects would be addressed in the event of a divorce,” says one AAML member. “The top items covered in a postnup are ones that typically cause the most stress and concern if a marriage enters a place of real uncertainty.”

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 Posted on March 17, 2016 in Domestic Violence

When thinking about domestic violence, our minds tend to picture a female victim on the receiving end of emotional or physical abuse. While the numbers on female domestic violence victims are certainly startling, domestic violence advocates across the country are hoping to bring attention to the fact that domestic violence affects men as well. Men in same-sex and heterosexual relationships can and, unfortunately, often do become the victims of domestic violence. In fact, according to the National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey conducted in 2010, one American man is abused by a spouse, intimate, or domestic partner every 37.8 seconds. That is over three million male victims each year in the United States alone. Those numbers may pale in comparison to statistics on female domestic violence victims, but advocates believe the issue still deserves more attention.

Advocates say that male victims of domestic violence struggle with seeking help similarly to female victims. Men also question if they will be believed and helped by authorities, and fear possible retaliation from their abuser if they seek help. Male and female victims commonly face these worries, and many unfortunately suffer in silence without reporting their abuse. Advocates say, however, that there is another barrier that keeps men from seeking help. They say men tend to believe that domestic violence laws and support systems are built only to protect women. Is that true?

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 Posted on March 15, 2016 in Divorce

As smartphone apps like Tinder and OkCupid continue to gain popularity, dating in America has become increasingly digital. Most of us know a happy couple who met and fell in love through a dating app, and many of those relationships lead to happy marriages. Not all of these apps, however, are about finding love. A group of new companies are hoping to simplify another aspect of relationships: separation. Companies like Wevorce and Separate.us now offer users the ability to divorce their spouse through an app on their smartphone or tablet, and at a much lower cost than a typical divorce. Can the complex divorce process really be navigated via an app?

Divorce Online

Promising to keep couples from paying large legal fees, new start-ups like Wevorce and Separate.us allow users to navigate the divorce process for a significantly smaller fee. A simple "traditional" divorce with assistance from an attorney can still be relatively inexpensive, as little as $2,500, according to John Slowiaczek, the president-elect of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers. These divorce apps, however, purport to offer couples solutions for under $1,000. Wevorce, for example, has a step-by-step guide that helps users navigate the divorce process, complete with mediators who are accessible through video-conferencing. Wevorce’s packages start at $749. Another company, Separate.us, makes it possible for users to divorce for as little as $1,000, depending on the circumstances of their divorce. These companies aim to help couples divorce without legal representation, which is where the high costs typically associated with divorce often come into play. Divorce, however, is complicated, so can couples really trust these apps? In some cases, maybe, but they are not for everyone.

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 Posted on March 10, 2016 in Divorce

High net-worth divorces can become complicated for a number of reasons. Take, for example, a case where two spouses marry but make different lifestyle choices. One spouse pursues a career and amasses wealth while the other focuses on raising children and maintaining the household. The money-earning spouse asks for a divorce, and suddenly, the other spouse has no access to funding to finance her side of the divorce. Should the ‘non-monied’ spouse be left at a disadvantage? Now, financiers hoping to profit off of the high divorce rate in the United States have spearheaded a new industry known as “divorce lending,” which has risen in popularity, especially in high net-worth cases.

How Does Divorce Lending Work?

Major divorce lenders have spread across the United States, each with a varying method of supplying their clients with funds to finance their divorce and living expenses. BBL Churchill, one of the major players in the divorce funding industry, offers its clients loans and charges interest on them. Balance Point Funding, out of Los Angeles, funds their clients and then takes a cut of any marital assets that are won. Those in the divorce funding industry says the goal is to help clients fight for themselves and ensure that they do not settle too early.

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 Posted on March 08, 2016 in Child Custody

Adjusting to life as a co-parent can be challenging. While you and your spouse were once a united parenting front, you will now need to employ patience and cooperation while parenting with your ex whose parenting style may differ greatly from yours. It can be troubling to watch your children be influenced by a parent whose values do not match yours, but what can be done? Consistency is the key to good co-parenting, and makes the divorce adjustment process much easier on children as well. Talk to your spouse about the importance of consistency as you two move forward as co-parents in the wake of your divorce.

Why Is Consistency Important?

Consistency allows for the smoothest divorce transition possible. Co-parents are encouraged to maintain the same routines, household rules, and habits that they previously established in their shared household. This makes the divorce process much easier on the children, who can become easily confused if rules at mom’s house are different than the rule’s at dads house. In a difficult time of transition, like divorce, children need consistency to provide some sense of normalcy.

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 Posted on February 29, 2016 in Divorce

Divorce can be a touchy subject. If you are considering a divorce, you are likely nervous about how to bring up the subject with your spouse. Asking for a divorce can be one of the most challenging things you will ever do in your life, so it is important that you proceed with caution. The goal should be to discuss the subject openly and honestly, and prepare yourselves for an amicable divorce process. While asking your spouse for a divorce may be difficult at the time, it may be the first step to bringing both of you greater happiness in life. Recently, a few marriage and divorce experts from across the country shared some dos and don’ts to keep in mind when broaching the subject of divorce with your spouse.

Pick a Good Time

Marriage and divorce specialists say that choosing an ideal time to have the divorce discussion with your spouse is extremely important. Pick a time where both of you can talk, uninterrupted and free from distractions. Turn your phones off, make other arrangements for the kids, and allow yourselves space to have an honest conversation. Avoid casually dropping that you would like a divorce. All too often, one spouse will say they want a divorce during an argument or another tense situation, and this only sets the stage for further conflict during the process.

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