Posted on May 17, 2016 in Divorce

Divorce is no walk in the park. In fact, divorce is often considered the second most stressful event a person can experience in life, after the death of a spouse. Maintaining any sense of normalcy while going through a divorce can be challenging. For those with jobs, just surviving the work day can be difficult. How can you be expected to be a productive professional when even getting out of bed seems impossible? First, know you are not alone. Most people struggle with work while going through the divorce process. With the incoming calls, emails from attorneys, divorce preparation, and the wide range of emotions to process, how is one expected to focus on work? If you are struggling to remain productive at work while going through a divorce, follow these tips that can help you stay distraction free and focused.

Talk to the Right People

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 Posted on May 12, 2016 in Divorce

Each year, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) releases data collected from Americans across the country covering their feelings and opinions on a variety of family issues. These include same sex marriage, cohabitation prior to marriage, and divorce. For many, the most recently released data included a surprise. American opinions on non-marital relationships, sex before marriage, same-sex adoption, and children born out of wedlock have grown increasingly liberal. This is hardly surprising. When asked about divorce however, a majority of Americans responded that they believe it is not an acceptable solution to marital problems. Why have Americans become significantly more liberal towards alternative family arrangements, yet more conservative towards divorce? The answer is, contrary to popular opinion, that marriage in America is not dying. The meaning of marriage has simply changed.

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 Posted on May 10, 2016 in Divorce

One of the biggest concerns couples face when deciding to divorce or not is their children. No loving parent wants to break up their family, and most parents considering divorce worry about the potential negative impacts divorce can have on their children. Will divorce ruin my children’s lives? Will they ever know what love is? Will they be okay splitting time between two homes? In response to these fears, parents in unhappy marriages often choose to stay together for the sake of their children. The reality, however, is that an unhappy home is more damaging for your children than the brief pain of divorce followed by happiness. Divorce, in many cases, is the best choice for your children.

Modeling an Unhappy Relationship

While breaking the news of divorce to children is never easy, and many families struggle through the divorce process and lifestyle change afterwards, choosing to stay together for your children’s sake can be vastly more damaging. If you and your spouse stay married, but fill your home with conflict, that is the picture of marriage you are imprinting on your children. As children grow up, they learn how to model their own relationships based on the relationships they see around them. Children learn what love means by how they are treated, and how they see others in love treat each other. Do you want to model a healthy, loving relationship to your children, or one filled with negativity and conflict? Staying together may keep your family together, but if your marriage is unhealthy, you are teaching your children to accept the same in their lives.

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 Posted on May 05, 2016 in Divorce

Divorce is a life-altering decision, and one that should not be taken lightly. Everyone deserves happiness, but at what point is your relationship past saving, and your best action to separate and move on? While no one, aside from yourself, can determine if your marriage is over, there are a few items to consider when deciding whether or not to end your relationship. One prominent US doctor, health counselor, and life coach recently shared a few important reasons your marriage may be salvageable, and a few others that indicate divorce is likely your best option.

Reasons to Work on Your Relationship

Health Concerns: Any life changing event can have health implications, and divorce is no different. The stress and emotional whirlwind you will likely face during your divorce could be damaging to your health, especially if you are battling an illness. If you, your spouse, or any family member is facing a life-threatening illness, consider waiting and working on your relationship. If divorce is inevitable, consider choosing a time when everyone is in good health.

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 Posted on May 03, 2016 in Domestic Violence

When most of us think of domestic abuse, we think of one spouse physically or emotionally hurting the other. While physical harm and emotional abuse are two common aspects of domestic violence, there is another aspect that many victims report experiencing; economic abuse. Imagine being unable to help yourself because somebody has control of your finances, or has cut you off completely from financial resources. For many such victims, this is the case. In fact, according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV), 94 to 99 percent of domestic violence victims report experiencing some form of economic abuse. Fortunately, help is available.

What Is Economic Abuse?

Economic abuse occurs when an abuser attempts to gain power or control over an individual by limiting access to assets or preventing future earning. The abuser's goal is to limit the victim’s choices by making them dependent on the abuser. This often goes hand-in-hand with physical domestic abuse. The victim is unable to leave, out of fear of harm and lack of financial resources. Economic abuse can take many different forms.

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 Posted on April 28, 2016 in Mediation and Collaborative Law

With the bevy of emotions most people face during divorce, finances can easily get neglected. As your relationship is ending, money may be your last priority, but it is important that you keep tabs on your finances to avoid future difficulties. If you decide to divorce, you and your spouse have a few options from which to choose. When most people picture divorce, they think of two aggressive attorneys representing wounded spouses hoping to hurt each other in a long, drawn-out battle. While a litigated divorce may be necessary in some cases, it certainly is not the only option. Litigated divorces are often expensive and emotionally draining. Rather than fighting each other, preserve your wealth through two less aggressive options; mediation and collaborative divorce.

Mediation

Did you know that you and your spouse can choose to work with a neutral, third party divorce mediator who can help you reach the same settlement a litigated divorce would achieve? In mediation, the mediator will work with both parties to discuss any divorce related issues needing attention, and help both parties reach agreeable outcomes. If you and your spouse are capable of working together, mediation can be a faster, more efficient, and significantly less costly method of divorce. Couples can discuss every important divorce matter including:

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 Posted on April 26, 2016 in Divorce

Divorce is often a challenging process, but there is one aspect of the experience many people report being the most stressful: their time spent in court. Most people have never set foot in a courtroom prior to their divorce, and while there are ways to avoid court room battles, such as mediation, many couples find court to be unavoidable. Without prior knowledge of how a courtroom procedure works, the process can be nerve-wracking. How should you behave? What should you wear? What should you expect? With a little prior planning, and an understanding of the process going in, you can help relieve your courtroom nervousness and have a successful experience. Here is what you need to know:

Plan Ahead With Your Attorney

No one should be expected to go to a day in court without preparation beforehand. Any quality divorce attorney will meet with their client to review everything about their day in court, handling topics like what you will be expected to say, what issues the hearing will discuss, and how the court process will go. Rather than being caught off guard during your hearing, meet with your attorney ahead of time to prepare yourself. Strategizing in advance will help you feel ready to face your time in court, so it is recommend that you set aside time to meet with your attorney before every court session, as different areas of your divorce may be covered at different times.

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 Posted on April 21, 2016 in Divorce

Divorce can be difficult, both emotionally and financially. In addition to costly legal fees, asset division, child support, and other items that can take a financial toll, people often wonder if their credit score can be affected in any way by divorce. Having a healthy credit score is a major key to financial independence post-divorce, as many possible future changes, such as renting a new apartment or purchasing a vehicle, require a good credit score. There are a few ways that divorce can positively or negatively affect your credit score. If you are about to divorce, or already in the midst of one, here are a few things to pay attention to regarding your credit score.

You Are Still Responsible for Shared Debt

Most married couples open shared accounts, such as shared credit cards or a joint mortgage. When you divorce, the name listed on an account is responsible for that debt, regardless of the parties' marital status. Lenders expect payment, so it is important to pay attention to joint accounts when dissolving your marriage. If your soon-to-be ex decides to stop making payments, you are still responsible, and your credit score could be damaged. For those fortunate enough to divorce amicably, payment arrangements can be made for the benefit of both parties. Others divorcing with more conflict may find it difficult to divide debt, and should consider other options to avoid risking their credit scores. A wealth planning manager with Wells Fargo recommends that divorcing couples either:

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 Posted on April 19, 2016 in Family Law

Child custody and parenting time are issues that often lead to conflict in divorce cases. These difficult-to-resolve issues can lead to lengthy litigation and increased hostility between the parties. Finding a resolution that is in the best interest of the children involved is the top priority, but this can be challenging, as often times one or both parents are not entirely forthcoming about their home life. In such cases, the thoughts and opinions of the children involved may be needed. The family’s children can share any details, good or bad, that can help the judge determine the best possible outcome for them. Putting a child on a stand in a courtroom, however, or in an interview with a judge, can be risky, as divorce alone is challenging for children. No child should ever be made to choose one parent over the other or feel intimidated. Fortunately, working with a Guardian ad Litem, a trained specialist who provides insight to the court, is a much less intimidating option to ensure the child’s best interests are being met.

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 Posted on April 14, 2016 in Divorce

Everyone deserves to be happy, no matter your age. If you are 50 or over and considering divorce, you are not alone. In fact, divorce among couples older than 50 is so common in America today, it has earned it’s own name: “gray divorce.” According to a study conducted by Bowling Green University, the rate of gray divorces doubled between 1990 and 2010. Why? Some couples choose to wait to separate until their children are out of the house. Others may be in their second or third marriage, a group that has an even higher likelihood for divorce. The baby boomer generation is also healthier, more active, and expected to live longer than previous generations, so perhaps today’s older couples at 50 or 60 years old feel they still have a long life to live, and are unwilling to be unhappy in their marriage. Whatever the reason, a divorce attorney can help you navigate the divorce process, and help you deal with a few common challenges couple’s going through a gray divorce often face. Here are three potential struggles you may face divorcing at an older age.

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