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Posted on in Child Custody

coparenting, parenting after divorce, Naperville family law attorneyFor divorced parents, communication is crucial. Studies show that post divorced children are most successful when they are able to spend time with both parents, so being able to coordinate and communicate with your ex is absolutely necessary. Speaking with an ex, however, is often much easier said than done. How can you be expected to communicate with a person you would rather not speak to again in your life? While keeping in touch with your ex can be difficult, there are many different tools co-parents can use to keep their communication conflict free. The next time you need to get in touch with your ex, try one of these effective strategies.


Email is a valuable tool for co-parents. Emails are typically quick and to the point, leaving little room for emotion or personal attacks. Emails are very effective for communicating schedules, upcoming activities, and updates on the child’s well being. This is an especially valuable tool for parents who struggle with communicating in person or over the phone, as it allows both parents to quickly get their message across with little time to bring up past issues. Give your ex an email address that you check frequently, and be sure they give you the same. When preparing your emails, type them as if you were writing a colleague or friend. Keep things friendly, simple, and to the point. Keep in mind that your emails could potentially be used in court, if further litigation is needed, so avoid any personal attacks or vulgar language that may reflect poorly on you down the road. As a courtesy, co-parents should respond to any email they receive from each other, even it is simply to acknowledge that a message has been received.


splitting holidays, Naperville Illinois divorce attorneyFall’s official arrival means the holidays are just around the corner. Three major approaching holidays, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas, are all great times to get together as a family. All three are days to relax, have fun, and enjoy great food and company. Relaxing can be hard, however, if you have to handle the holidays as a co-parent. For divorced families, the holiday season can be stressful and emotionally painful. For the first time this year, many recently divorced parents will have a court-ordered parenting plan that more or less dictates how they get to spend each holiday with their children. Many other families have had to deal with this challenge for years. Transitioning from spending holidays as a family to a court mandated schedule is a difficult change to overcome, but there are ways to lessen the stress.

Review Your Parenting Plan

Many co-parents can not remember the plans they made for handling the holidays. A court-approved parenting plan that both you and your spouse agreed to during your divorce should include details on how each holiday is to be spent. There are many different ways to handle holidays as co-parents. Parents should consider their children’s ages, personalities, and relationships with each parent while deciding on a plan. A few of the most common plans include:


Posted on in Child Custody

child custody battle, Naperville IL divorce attorneyGoing through a divorce is stressful, expensive, and emotionally draining. Add children into the mix, and the situation becomes even more difficult. Even the most amicable of divorces involving children have their tense moments, as parents do their best to establish a plan for raising their children post divorce. Many parents, however, face less than amicable spouses that intend to fight against them for the custody of their children. Fighting for child custody is one of the most difficult, emotional processes a parent can go through. A child custody battle should not be taken lightly, and involves serious preparation by any party that intends on being involved in the child’s life. If you foresee a difficult court battle against your spouse, these steps can help you prepare for your time in court.

Find an Attorney

For those fortunate enough to be divorcing amicably, hiring an attorney may not be necessary. Many parents that divorce peacefully are able to negotiate a custody agreement that works for both of them outside of court. If you anticipate a fight from your ex, however, hiring a qualified attorney is extremely important. Your ex, if they intend to fight against you for child custody, has likely already hired an attorney, so it is important that you find representation for yourself.

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